Emotional

Sometimes I get emotional
Sometimes I do some stupid things
Sometimes I say what I should just keep inside
Sometimes I'm sad about everything
Sometimes I'm mad and break some things
Sorry times 10 but you just got in the way

Don't give up now running away
I won't hurt you, sometimes I'm just a pain
And that's the way it is
That's just the way I am

Sometimes I feel like crying
Laying down and dying
That's when I need you
laughing always easy, but sometimes I'm just scared you'll leave me
That's when I feel emotional

You say I'm just impossible
Totally unpredictable
I'm just a girl get use to it
No big deal

You can't change me why would you try?
I'm no angel but I can make you smile
And that's the way it is
That's just the way I am

Sometimes I feel like crying
Laying down and dying
That's when I need you
laughing always easy but, sometimes I'm just scared you'll leave me
That's when I feel emotional

Don't give up
I won't hurt you
Oh, sometimes I'm just a pain
And that's the way it is
That's just the way I am

That's when I need you
laughing always easy but, sometimes I'm just scared you'll leave me
That's when I feel oh yeah
That's when I need you
Sometimes I get emotional

That's just the way I am
Sometimes I feel like crying
Laying down and dying
That's when I need you
laughing always easy but sometimes I'm just scared you'll leave me
That's when I feel emotional

Hum... ouvi hoje esta música pela primeira vez (Thanks to Ana :) ) e ficou-me na cabeça...esta letra está tão "me" lol parece escrita por mim...

No one told me it would be so hard!

I am scared, god, I don't remember being just like this, scared of breathing, of thinking...It seems that every choice I make his cursed. Just another big twist in my life, another turmoil of emotions to deal with and again I don't know how to react. What started like a pleasant day ended like being held in hell. I've wondered a lot lately and I can't find any single reason to have a fate just like mine. If God is out there looking for us, shouldn't he be caring, shouldn't we all be happy?! Then why do I have the sensation that He's just playing us around like toys? Perhaps I'm wrong, perhaps my mind is now so corrupted by our society that I've just fallen into ignorance, that I can't see the love He send us everyday in every simple task we do...But even my easiest tasks are a burden.
Like I've mentioned before on one of my previous posts I believe that we are only in the world for one purpose, seeking love. Everyone wants to be loved, understood, respected and if there's something I believe in it's Soulmates. We may not find it today, nor tomorrow, nor even in years of this lifetime that we can remember, but our souls are constantly moving from body to body never leaving the path of earth. And in those years, decades, centuries our soul will seek their Other Part till the ends of earth, we can find it once, twice, constantly, we may stay with it forever or we may have just a brief meeting. Soulmates don't stand together everytime, love is too simple too a world like ours. Humans tend to complicate, why making love easy when it just creates a whole new branch of emotions most of the times unknown?! We always go for the hardest way, we try to complex everything and when it comes to make the right decision, too choose, we just choose the easiest path, the one we think won't give us any troubles, but turns out being the hardest one, and sometimes we just leave behind an important part of us.
Why this whole rambling about nothing?Well easy enough, I'm troubled and I don't know who to talk to. I'm not in love, don't take me wrong, there are a lot of people for whom I care about, there are even two or three guys that I might fancy a bit, they're witty, they're charming...But before all those possible feelings I have friendships I'm not willing to give up. Bonds that took me really long to create and that are more important to me than anything else. I'm one of those who seek for the love of their friends instead of trying to create a new whole kind of relationship, perhaps because I've been disappointed in the past, 'cause I'm afraid of suffering again.
I thought I had just moved on and I had in a way, there wasn't that need of having someone by my side (except for my friends), there wasn't anything distracting me from school, everything was smooth. I should have been alert, perhaps I could have avoided all this confusion and awkwardness but now it's just too late. And then when I was just happy I was the plain me with no big worries, a tinkling sensation found it's way to my heart. Am I just overreacting?Am I just making a great confusion with a deep friendship and a lighter kind of love? I wish I am, I'm just praying that if God is really there taking care of me He will make this day just a dream in everyone's mind, specially in mine...I hope I woke up a few hours later with the feeling of a weird dream where I thought my life was turning into chaos. Only then I can believe one of my beliefs...Love only seek us when we aren't looking for it.

Ladybird

Ser diferente

Estar triste e muito feliz

querer o que sempre quis

ter aquilo que ninguém tem

sempre a rir e a chorar

estar calada mas a falar

amar e odiar alguém

ser algo de estranho, invulgar

ser a lua ou ser o mar

viver junto do paraíso

jóia cara sem valor

sentir-me bem mas com dor

estar séria com um sorriso

ser algo diferente eu queria

ser uma manhã, ser um dia

sonhar com a realidade

ser eterna mas morrer

uma recordação a esquecer

mentir dizendo a verdade.

Queria ser algo impossível

começar quando terminou

ser uma princesa encantada

ser tudo não sendo nada

mas diferente do que sou.

Este poema não é da minha autoria, com muita pena minha :pouts: mas quem mo deu nunca me disse quem o tinha escrito. Só não quero que fiquem a pensar que sou grande poetisa...=) Traz muito boas recordações...:sighs and daydream:

Ladybird

Love & Friendship

Hum...cá estou eu outra vez :) Acabei de receber uma queixa porque só escrevo em inglês! Desculpem, mas o inglês é parte de mim e é-me muito mais fácil dizer aquilo que penso e sinto dessa forma. Mas vou fazer um esforço para escrever mais em português. Afinal é a minha língua.

Ah, no meu ultimo texto esqueci-me de mencionar o facto de que a fotografia não me pertence...é da autoria do meu priminhu! São os dois gatinhos dele(mãe e filha) juntamente com o hamster, que infelizmente ja morreu:(. Eu escolhi exactamente esta foto porque não é todos os dias que vemos um amor como aquele não é verdade? Tal como eu referi no meu texto todos procuramos o amor, pode ser é de diferentes formas. Como o amor entre pessoas é o mais comum e aquele em que pensamos quando nos referimos a tal sentimento achei apropriado demonstrar outro tipo de amor. O senso comum costuma dizer que os opostos se atraem, e eu acredito que torna as coisas mais interessantes. Ao trabalharmos em sentidos diferentes e lutarmos no fundo pelo mesmo, pelo amor, digamos que é tudo mais "challenging". Sentimos que as coisas valem a pena, porque estamos a mudar e a fazer mudanças. E apesar de o ser humano ter medo das mudanças porque estas tornam toda a base que este criou para se apoiar ao longo da vida inconstante, elas são necessárias e fazem-nos crescer, e se crescermos amparados pelo amor e carinho dos nossos amigos estamos sem dúvida a crescer para algo. Esse algo pode ser grande ou pequeno, mas é importante o suficiente para mudar o curso de toda a humanidade apesar de nem sempre nos apercebermos disso.

Por ser aquilo que sou hoje tenho que agradecer aos meus amigos, aqueles que estiveram sempre comigo e que vão estar sempre comigo. Podem pensar que sou ingrata por não referir a minha família,o meu pai, a minha mãe, o meu irmão, todos eles são importantes para mim é verdade, mas por serem família é o papel deles mostrarem-nos o caminho a seguir. Também os amo, mas é um amor diferente. Enquanto que eles estão comigo qundo estou doente, quando estou triste ou contente, e me mostram o que segundo mundo está certo e errado, os laços que criamos são muito diferentes dos laços que com os meus amigos criei. Porque os meus amigos cresceram comigo naqueles pequenos desafios a que ninguém dá importância. Aqueles desafios que são tão importantes para que cresçamos mas que ninguém nos quer mostrar e por isso eu tenhu que lhes dizer um grande OBRIGADA.

Ladybird

Just another day

Another day passed. Another dream shattered into pieces. Perhaps I'm wrong in standing up to my beliefs and I should just let me go with the sea of people that insist on taking me. In a world where our choices aren't worthy and we only have a fake sensation of free will there's no need to fight.

Sometimes I feel like the world is closing in and everything around me is surrounded by shadows. And I'm afraid of that shadows, people who I don't know but make it their routine to enter and exit small parts of my life. And then there are those who play a really important role on my existence, those who I can't live without them. It's like they're a part of me. However all the happiness they bring to me can't fullfil all my desires.Even though my friends are a really important part of my life there are some spaces that aren't meant for them, some spaces that are just meant to someone capable of love me with all his heart and soul. I'm not a person to give myself willingly at the beginning... i like to create bonds of trust and friendship, to know every little bit of information I can gather from that person. And only then I let myself fall in the deep depths of love. To feel loved, to be tenderdly held, isn't that everyone's dream?I believe it is, we just seek it by different means.

Ladybird